Do you ever have one of those days where things just go wrong? It's only 10am and I'm already having one. Do you ever have one of those dreams that is so real that you act it out in you sleep? They happen very rarely, but put 2 and 2 together, and I spent half the night trying to sleep on the 4-foot couch in my room, so I get up this morning after a shit nights sleep with a sore neck. I am going through my morning as normal, and as normal on a gym day, I blend up one of my protein smoothies to take to the gym with me. Today it consisted of a banana, 4 types of frozen berries, 2 spoonfulls of cottage cheese, a scoop of protein powder, flax oil, 4 different types of nut, 4 ice cubes and 400ml of water. All fairly standard to what I make, but today, my blender decided to spectacularly break. A piece that holds the blades in snapped off, the blades fall out the bottom, and of course, all of the above ingredients soon follow, covering the surface the blender was on and everything next to it, including a portable phone, as well as covering the cupboards below this surface, and of course the floor below that which has floorboards down, so this purple mixture is also now sat in between the floorboards. I think it took me about half-an-hour to clear up. I was pissed off by this point, and having been a borderline gym day or not, it now emphatically became a not gym day. But I thought I may as well at least get to Tesco, and get myself a new blender, so just as I'm about to leave, the heavens open to the point it just isn't worth leaving the house for any purpose. Especially on a bike. So fed up, I decided to write this instead. It's not been the greatest start to a day.

The reason that I named this blog 'Waiting', is because that is all I am doing now. I am waiting for this fucking agency to ever get back to me. I am waiting for other temporary jobs that I have since applied for to get back to me. I am waiting for this job in Canada to get back to me. I am even waiting for people to bid on the items I've listed on eBay. I have suddenly got to a point, where everything I need to happen this Summer, is based on waiting for the actions of other people, and that's something I hate relying on. I am even waiting for Everton to make their first Summer signing. Never have I known an offseason as depressing as this as an Everton fan. Our new stadium is called in for government review, our CEO resigns, our manager still hasn't signed a new contract and we cannot seem to sign a single player to add to an already depleted squad from last season. To top that, one of our best players from last year has now broken a bone in his foot, so we currently have 2 healthy first-team midfielders with the start of the season 3 days away. This in a team that typically plays with a 5-man midfield. And to top it all off, the Seahawks franchise record-breaking receiver from last season, Bobby Engram, he has gone down with a cracked shoulder and will be out for 8 weeks. My god it's depressing to be me right now. To top it all off, I have an exchange rate calculator on my desktop, and in the passed few days, have watched as the £ vs the $ exchange rate has dropped Exchange Rate from £1 = >$2, to this morning, £1 = $1.894. Put more simply, this is decreasing the value of my savings for when I travel. Quite significantly. Even if the trend isn't yet being followed by the CA$, the price of US goods in Canada will rise as a result of this shift, at least in the short-term, so when I'll be arriving, they'll be costing more. I may be no economist, but that is how I am viewing this shift in the exchange rate, especially if it is a longer term trend. We now also have inflation of 4.4% in this country, so that has now propted me to start the shift around of my finances, quite simply so my savings are not depleting in value. Fuckin eh I just want something to go right. I even just got an email from someone that I applied to a temporary job with yesterday, and that is a no go. No reason for why, but it's a no. The pull for me to do medical testing is getting ever stronger, though the disparaging comments from my parents are keeping me away right now. I could have £3,500 for testing a new drug for 3 weeks. That's probably £1,500 more than I would earn if I got offered a job today, and worked through until I left for Canada, and it would only take 3 weeks of my time in residency, probably with broadband Internet, so I could spend 3 weeks uninteruptedly working on my travel plans. For now though, I'll head to their worries.

All this downturn in spirits was kicked of by this fucking agency, that last week told me I had a placement. Then it got delayed, but would hopefully be on again the next day. Then the next day etc. I phoned them again on Monday, but there seemed to be some problem with the phoneline and I could not get through. So I sent them an email, and 2 days on, have still received no response. Now I just don't know where I stand. In fact I'm going to try phoning again now... Well I actually got through this time. Though my agent was on the phone so the receptionist has taken a contact number (which she already had?), and Vicky, my agent, should be calling me back soon. I can see that I still won't have got a response by 5 this evening. But at least the phones were working this time. I'll call again if I haven't heard anything in the next couple of hours. This drag-on, with absolutely no contact is what initially brought me down. I hate job-hunting. I find it so damn depressing, having to suck the cock of every damn person you hand a CV to, opening up exactly what you've been doing, getting interrogated... I hate it. So up until last Monday, when I thought I had a placement, my motivation to job hunt was gone; I didn't need it anymore. Now I'm just in limbo. I don't know if I have work coming or not. I have an agent that seems void to the skill of contact. I don't want to go back out onto the street job hunting because I hate it so much, but if I don't I don't know if I have any impending work or not. I'm in a limbo right now. As I said I've been applying to temp jobs that have appeared on places such as Gumtree, but thousands of people look at that site everyday. It's a lottery if anything would ever come from that. I might spend the latter part of today going to more agencies, seeing if anything else turns up.

Until, or even if, I am able to get the job situation sorted out here, I have so much now riding on the job I was interviewed for in Canada. If I got a call today, and I had that job, it wouldn't really matter to me if I found work here or not. I would know, that come November time I would be gainfully employed, I would have a place to live, and the money that I am now scrounging to gather before I leave would become fairly insignificant. But so much is riding on getting this job, which is by no means a sure thing. Based on how the interview went, I would say I have a 60/40 chance in favour of getting this job. But it's hard to tell. I was the first person they interviewed all season, so I wasn't even able to tell from the tone of her voice if I was comparable to other applicants. I probably won't find out for 2 more weeks, yet I have so much riding on a position I may not even get. I just wait. Again.

I have managed to make a little money this week though. Where most nice people get given small change they don't want, they donate it to charity, or give it to the homeless. I'm not that nice, and I keep all my pennies in a giant plastic beer bottle. I cashed in on those this week and made £199.78; about a weeks wages if I had a job, so that was something. I was expecting it to be worth around £80, so I was pretty chuffed that it came to so much. Some 644 x 1p coins, 337 x 2p coins, 676 x 5p coins, 536 x 10p coins, 491 x 20p coins and 1 x £1 coin that somehow found its way into the mix, made me smile for a bit at least, as I saw some boost to my finances. This was though brought back down to earth by the tax rebate that I was hoping to claim, no longer being claimable because I can't find the relevant documents. I may not have been eligible anyway, but I've lost the chance to find out as I no longer have all the documentation. It's my own fault for taking so damn long. It may've been worth a few hundred £'s to me. But then it may not've been. Now I'll never know. To put into perspective the value of that £200 to me: I'll spend probably £25 per week on food, £6.50 on gym membership, and then maybe £5 on anonymous other expenditures. That's £36.50 I spend per week. That £200 is 5 or 6 weeks living for me. I was always supposed to pay rent to live at home once I finished university, but I think since I'll be leaving soon anyway, or because I'm not earning, I'm conveniently not doing so, which is a nice gesture. I'm not sure of the exact reason, but I'm not going to bring the subject up. I have zero travel costs as I cycle everywhere, and today being ¼ of the way through a 100-day detox, I am spending zero on going out. So those really are my only outgoings. If the prices of blenders in Twickenham are the same price as in Hull, I should be able to get a replacement from Tescos for around £3.50, so I'll even have £1.50 left to spend this week in anonymous expenditures. So that £200 is quite significant to me. A job would be awesome, but take away the tax, and the additional expenditures of working, such as travel and buying ready-made food everyday, you don't actually save too much. Although a job would be great right now, I don't think I'd be that much better off than really focusing on selling the things I have and living on a shoestring. If I need to get really tight, I could easily cut down my food budget. £25 for one person. That is fucking luxury!

I did though say that I have been pushed into getting my finances in good check by the 4.4% inflation. I have a 2 year high-interest bond that is maturing next week. That currently receives 4.75% interest, so 0.35% in real terms. It's lucky that I applied for it as a student and haven't told the bank that I've now graduated, as I'd probably otherwise be making a loss if I was being taxed. Yesterday though, I opened up a new ISA with an Icelandic bank as they were willing to transfer my current ISA from HSBC, something that HSBC wasn't even willing to do between 2 different ISAs within HSBC. I did have to declare that I wouldn't open another ISA this financial year, something that is an absolute lie, because I probably will've done so within the next couple of days. I don't see how they'll ever know though. And I'm not breaching any of the governments limits on how much I can invest each year, it's just that I don't know this bank well enough to trust them with as significant sums of money as I would be trusting them with, if I obeyed that declaration. I have come to the conclusion though, that to keep my money so it is secure, accessible and working for me as I travel, I will need a total of 7 bank accounts when I leave (including 2 credit cards). Possibly even an 8th for added security. So whilst I wait for work to find me, that is a project I can get underway. It's now been nearly an hour since I called the agency, and I still haven't heard anything, so either this is a really long phone call, or I'm going to have to call back in a bit. I might be waiting for work for a while, so should get my banking sorted at least.

I am having to hold back right now from one other way to make some money. In the passed I've been able to make money playing online poker. Though I just lost it all afterwards, but I have turned $25 into $200 in a day before. Poker Gambling is a mugs game. Anybody knows that, but I just feel I'm due a bit of luck. So maybe I'll invest $25 into my poker account that has been baron for at least 6 months now, and see what I can turn up. As long as its the only money I put in, $25 isn't too much. And like I said, I've turned that into $200 in a day before. I just lost it the next day, so clever play could pay-off. You're playing against other people, not a casino, and there are a lot of mugs out there who lose £1000's a day. I've never gambled before to make money, only ever for fun. If you win it's a bonus, but I just see gambling as paying for the excitement. To play to win you're a mug. But I might do it anyway. $25 can't hurt. If I could turn it into $200, $500, $1,000 even, then I wouldn't even need work. I hope common sense prevails and I don't play, but I just have a feeling (like everybody does), that this is a good time to play.

One more thing: If you didn't see UFC 87 on Saturday night, then see it. It was awesome!! Brock Lesnar is a beast. UFC 87

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